Category Archives: Homophobia and bullying

“Jesus never shamed anyone, and he never shames us. “

From “Freed Hearts“:

The Church is Killing Its Gay Children”

The Deadly Results of Shame

July 27, 2015 by Susan Cottrell

Shame. It says, “There is something fundamentally wrong with you.” It is the lie at the very root of our identity. If I did something wrong, I can apologize and make amends. But if I am fundamentally wrong, what hope do I have?

Our greatest need is to be loved, to belong, to be accepted as we are. Shame says the exact opposite – that we do not fit in, are not acceptable as is and, fundamentally, are not lovable. Shame is the fundamental lie that keeps us separate, and it wreaks havoc in self-hatred and self-rejection.

Neither does he give us permission to shame each other. Brene Brown has done paradigm-shifting work on shame, and one particular finding about men and shame is earth-shattering.

“When looking at the traits associated with masculinity in the US, the researchers identified the following: winning, emotional control, risk-taking, violence, dominance, playboy, self-reliance, primacy of work, power over women, disdain for homosexuality, and pursuit of status. Understanding these lists and what they mean is critically important to understanding shame…” says Brene Brown.

Isn’t that a shock? “For men,” Brown says, “there’s a cultural message that promotes homophobic cruelty. If you want to be masculine in our culture, it’s not enough to be straight – you must also show an outward disgust for the gay community.”

This is a very serious situation.

Read more at Freed Hearts

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  • Bishop Vera, on the Sickness of Homophobia

    “People who say homosexuals are sick, are sick themselves”

    Bishop Raul Vera of Saltillo, Mexico, is renowned for his fearless work in favour of missing persons, immigrants, children and juveniles, indigenous populations, prostitutes and marginalized people of all types.  This includes standing up to the notorious and fearsome Mexican drug cartels, which has earned him frequent death threats, and speaking up against outrages of the Mexican government.

    4479e-raulvera252csaltillomexico

    His support for the marginalized includes strong support for gay and lesbian Catholics. Continue reading Bishop Vera, on the Sickness of Homophobia

    LGBT Catholic Pilgrims Meet Head of Vatican Council for Justice & Peace

    Cardinal  Peter Turkson, head of the Pontifical Council for Justice and Peace, has met with two LGBT Catholic pilgrims in Rome – and “reaffirmed his opposition to the criminalisation of homosexuals for who they are”.

    "Cardinal Tukson 987" by Haiducul - Own work. Licensed under CC BY 3.0 via Wikimedia Commons -
    “Cardinal Tukson 987” by Haiducul – Own work. Licensed under CC BY 3.0 via Wikimedia Commons –
    When two groups of lgbt Catholic pilgrims visited Rome for a Lenten pilgrimage, it was widely reported by mainstream media around the world, that the group from the USA had been given “VIP seats” for the Ash Wednesday papal audience. More interesting to me, is that two members of the English group were able to meet privately with one of the most influential Vatican officials, Cardinal  Peter Turkson, head of the Pontifical Council for Justice and Peace, and his personal assistant.
    Cardinal Turkson has served as cardinal under three popes, is a member of several Vatican congregations and other bodies in addition to his work as head of the Council for Justice and Peace – and is also from Africa, where criminalization of homosexuals is a major cause for concern, and other bishops have supported it. In the last papal conclave, the betting included him as a viable papabile. In view of his relatively youthful age, it is probable that he will still be a contender in the next conclave. His opinion matters.

    Continue reading LGBT Catholic Pilgrims Meet Head of Vatican Council for Justice & Peace

    ‘De-baptism’ Is the Latest Dutch Trend

    ‘De-baptism’ Is the Latest Dutch Trend

    The trend of Dutch Catholics ‘de-baptizing’ themselves is gaining traction after Pope Benedict XVI made remarks against marriage equality in his World Day of Prayer for Peace (January 1) address.

    Ontdopen.nl, the website that claims to provide automated ‘de-baptism,’ was begun as a response to the sexual abuse crisis in the Netherlands. Now, the Catholic Church’s continued campaign against marriage equality leads to a leap in website views from ten daily to ten thousand.

    Bondings 2.0 previously covered the Pope’s address which included a statement that same-gender marriages manipulate nature and destroy the ‘essence of the human creature.’

    According to Gay Star News, the ‘de-baptism’ process entails a person entering personal information and receiving a “ resignation letter” that can then be sent to diocesan and parish officials as formal separation from the Catholic Church.

    Website founder Tom Roes readily admits that ‘de-baptism’ is not exactly the function of Ontdopen.nl, telling LGBTQ Nation about its true function and limits:

    “‘Of course it’s not possible to be ‘de-baptized’ because a baptism is an event, but this way people can unsubscribe or de-register themselves as Catholics,’ Roes said, although he admits he has no way of verifying just how many visitors to his website actually follow through and leave the church.”

    The growth of Ontdopen.nl in the Netherlands, the first nation to legalize marriage equality and one where 44% of citizens claim no religious affiliation, should be troubling for Catholic leadership. Until now, most adherents passively separated themselves by not participating in Mass or parish activities, but generally when asked by pollsters still claimed “Catholic” as their religious affiliation. Actively separating oneself from Catholicism is a new and further step.

    With the United States emerging more like the Netherlands in providing greater LGBT equality and also declining in people who religiously affiliate, this Dutch trend is perhaps a troubling vision into American Catholicism’s future if the bishops continue their anti-equality efforts.

    –Bob Shine, New Ways Ministry

    via  « Bondings 2.0.

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    Bahamas Bishop Brands Clergy Who Attack Gays as Closet Cases

    Bishop Simeon B Hall in Bahamas goes from saying gay sex is ‘deadly’ and ungodly to defending LGBT community in one year.

    31 DECEMBER 2012 | BY TRIS REID-SMITH

    A senior Christian in the Bahamas has slammed clerics those who ‘demonize’ homosexuality and said they may be closet gays.Bishop Simeon Hall admitted he ‘acted in ignorance’ in the past on LGBT issues – in November 2011 he referred to gay male sex as a ‘deadly’ practice.But now the former president of the Bahamas Christian Council BCC has accused other council members of focusing on homosexuality rather than dealing with other issues – like gambling.In a press statement Hall said the church should affirm the humanity of gay people and indicated that those attacked LGBT rights were often secretly gay themselves.He said: ‘The demonization of homosexuals by some pastors is the greatest hindrance to any positive dialogue or efforts the church might establish with them.‘The Bahamian public in general, as well as pastors in particular, must be careful of what we demonize and protest. Psychologists tell us that sometimes the things we strike out against, we do so because a bit of it lies within us on a subliminal level.‘I also believe that of the 133 sins listed in the Bible, if a pastor can only preach on one of them it could very well be that he has that problem – if not in practice then perhaps dormantly.’He added the BCC appears to be ‘populated by a group of men who are number one homophobic and that’s the only time that they come alive or they pick small things to speak out against’.

    -more at Bahamas bishop brands clergy who attack gays as closet cases | Gay Star News.

    Catholic ‘Dignity’

    According to “Vatican digs in after gay marriage advances” (Tribune, Nov. 11), the Catholic Church opposes same-sex marriages because “Catholic teaching holds that homosexuals should be respected and treated with dignity but that homosexual acts are ‘intrinsically disordered.’” If you truly believe the former, how can you believe the latter?

    If you believe in treating blacks with dignity, but that they should also be slaves, what kind of dignity is that?

    Being polite and kind is not treating someone with dignity, which means “the quality of being worthy or esteemed.” How is denying a life of committed love to someone wired to be attracted to the same sex treating them with esteem?

    Of what worth do you esteem them to be worthy of? Of being an emotional eunuch? It’s that self-fulfilling approach that makes them “disordered.”

    Catholics aren’t treating gay men with dignity; they aren’t treating them as worthy men created with liberty and the freedom to pursue happiness in their own way. No, with marriage, it’s the pursuit of happiness the Catholic way — even if you’re not Catholic — or not at all.

    That how it was in the Middle Ages, not in 21st century America.

    Dean Spencer

    Salt Lake City

    -letter to The Salt Lake Tribune.

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